Breakup Reasons: Best of, Volume Two... The Men Speak Up

From the men of Twitter...

- "you really need to get that looked at" via @dan2bit
- "Lets get married on Saturday in the fall!" via @Streyeder
- "I hate sweet tea." via @Streyeder
- "I'm a vegetarian." via @Streyeder
- "She saves the gum she was chewing on your first date...that was dropped in the sand... Over 3mo prior." via @Streyeder
- "She spends more time texting her family and friends than talking to me. Actually texts me when I am sitting right beside her." via @lennylohan
- "She isn't Angela Lansbury." via @calamitysar
- "She irons your clothes- while you're wearing them" via @bizaromike
- "she "accidentally" takes you to the same restaurant her parents are eating at. On the 2nd date." via @A_Bald_Guy
- "won't let my dog sleep in the bed.... haterrrrr!!!!" via @DataPlanMan
- "she has more hair on her back then you do" via @A_Bald_Guy
- "calls mother EVER SINGLE DAY." via @Streyeder

See them all here.

Breakup Reasons: Best of, Volume One

These are from the ladies... stay tuned for the gents side of things...

- Couldn't find G-spot if he were stuck in a paper bag with it, a GPS and a miner's helmet. (via @jas508, the original #breakupreasons guru)
- thinks a nice dinner out is a waste of money, geographically undesirable, has tattoo on arm that says "your mom"
- rather play video games than have sex.
- more addicted to Twitter (via @jas508) than me.
- brings firearms to presidential events. total dealbreaker when u work in politics.
- sends love notes on kitten stationary. actually happened.
- He admires your taste in clothing...so much so that he wears it when you aren't home. (via @SassyGirlTN)
- has an unhealthy obsession with wolves.
- is undead.
- Failing to mention that ur still living with the WIFE you're "separated" from... (via @Lianne347)
- won't friend you on Facebook.
- still lives with parents.
- lives in Jersey (via @heykiddo)
- smokes, drinks daquiris, has mullet, thinks sorority girls are all ridiculous, borrows money from my broke ass
- hates beach, calls flip-flops "thongs", believes glenn beck, orders steak extra rare, drinks decaf for non-medical reason
- Hates tomatoes, mushrooms, condiments, and any food deemed "too spicy" (via @jas508)
- *on the 1st date, waiter places the check on the table, guy opens it & says: "so how we gonna do this?" (via @marbellus)
- overnight celibacy after 6 months of porn-style fucking (via @bealacey)
- Unwilling to accomodate my nap schedule (via @debihope)
- More

Contribute yours by adding #breakupreasons to your tweets.

[ED NOTE: Is this too much to require? Reasons why I'm single?]

Actual Email Sent to Multiple People At My Office Today

Should one of you besides me be loading our dishwasher on any given evening and also so kindly include the coffee carafe I use (truly a WORLD CLASS behavior when you do that), please be sure to detach its lid and put that in one of the side baskets in the washer.

This morning I found the lid in the bottom of the machine and of course if it had fallen on the heating element it not only would’ve melted, it could possibly have destroyed the machine itself.

I already spoke angrily about this with stunt doubles for Delila and Tumosa, using previously approved talking points – and both hotly denied any responsibility. In fact though, they avoided eye contact and quickly changed the subject to the rest of you. So we had fun talking the rest of the entire morning about you guys, then did some cartwheels, then went to lunch.

So let’s play it safe and use that side basket for that little piece of plastic. Make sure you use those side baskets appropriately when considering other purposes too. I’m sure NONE of us want to be walking in on someone doing something inappropriate with those side baskets.

I’m sure as we all work on this together, our sense of teamwork, harmony and common destiny will only become heightened with heartfelt fervor.

[EDITOR NOTE: LOL. What a tool.]

Things I Would NOT Rather Be Doing Today (Rather Than Working)

- attending a Congressional town hall meeting
- answering constituent phone calls on Capitol Hill
- watching Glenn Beck make shit up and have ignorent viewers believe it
- reading Karl Rove's first draft
- running on The Mall (feels like temp: 432 degrees)
- returning my cable box to Comcast (has been like 6 months since I switched to FIOS)

Things I Would Rather Be Doing Today (Rather Than Working)

In no particular order:

- noon yoga at Tranquil Space
- hopping a flight to Chicago for the weekend with @dcmarymargaret
- hopping a flight to Tampa to see JC Loader compete in her first triathalon
- Twittering by the pool
- shopping for sundresses
- getting a mani-pedi
- making the Fresh 365 tomato panzanella for lunch while watching Days of Our Lives
- drinking a pitcher of margaritas on someone's boat at Capitol Yacht Club (lookin' at you @whirlaway)
- reading one of the three books that I've started but not finished

[NOTICE: Going to the gym is nowhere on that list and it's too sweltering to start running today.]

DC MYTH: Twitter friends are only online...

Follow @dcmarymargaret, @floridagirlindc, Screech, @sfeuer, @ejhonsa on Twitter!

DC FACT: Teddy Will Never Win...

If he doesn't even get outta the gate anywhere near George, Abe and TJ...

DC FACT: The Star Spangled Banner Can Be Played on a Baseball Bat

(Hendrix version)

DC FACT: You can get Jagerbombs at Nationals Park

I'm not saying you should, but you can.

Dress for DC: How to Be Taken Seriously at 19

A friend recently asked my advice about what her daughter should wear now that she's starting out in DC. She's young and feels like no one takes her seriously. My advice was as follows... When you’re trying not to be taken for a kid at work, the two most important things are a couple of well cut blazers and comfortable but chic heels. Pair them with everything from skinny jeans to sheath dresses and you’ll be good to go.

I learned early on at age 19 working on presidential campaigns that if I had a blazer on I was taken more seriously. That doesn’t mean you have to have a dull suit – in fact, break away from all of the office drones in ill fitting, cheap suits.

Most of my wardrobe consists of simple sheath dresses, mostly black or navy, but sometimes with a dramatic splash of color. I toss on a blazer for a meeting with the boss, then lose it to go out with friends. (When you’re just starting out it’s important to buy clothes that can do double duty.)

It’s also important to note, that while my salary has gone up, the brands I shop may be pricier than entry level salary, but there are well cut, great options at H&M, Target, Old Navy, Banana Republic, JCrew etc that follow the same looks. Also don’t forget to scour Filenes, Marshalls, Ross… I still get a ton of great stuff there.

PS. Don’t be afraid to take risks. Just no cleavage, midriffs or too short skirts. And no flip flops unless you’re walking from metro. ;)

PSS. How do you think my DC look from 1993-4 has weathered the years? Both of those ensembles were care of Ann Taylor I believe...

Market Challenge: Mushrooms

Just picked up fresh, local mushrooms at Penn Quarter farmers market in DC. Can't wait to try a new recipe! What should I make?

Arugula, Blackberry, Feta and Red Pepper Salad

Just add a dash of vinegrette!

Note to Self: Celebrate DC's Rickey Month

Thanks to Amanda at Metrocurean for tipping me off to DC's 2nd annual Rickey Month.

Of course, I have been on a Rickey resurgence ever since I tasted Bourbon Steak's Rickey on my birthday last week. I liked it so much I had to have one to drown my post birthday blues on Friday too.

I'm sad to see that the BS bartenders aren't in the Rickey battle at Bourbon tonight, because their freshy-fresh-fresh limes are my favorite part. I'll have to check out the winner's version though... perfect for bringing back some of that birthday girl love when I meet up with my pal Stacy Thursday!

Cheers!

Peach-Feta-"Arugula Files" Panini

Peach-Feta-"Arugula Files" Panini, originally uploaded by tmgordon.

Today's market challenge involved fresh peaches (from WV, purchased at Eastern Market in Washington DC on Sunday Aug 2). As I previously blogged, I was inspired by the team at Arugula Files. This panini was sweet and savory delicious. It felt like a dessert but had the crunch of grilled french bread, lightly brushed with olive oil. The sweet peaches were bookended with feta crumbles and arugula. Recipe below:

Ingredients:
- one fresh peach, sliced 1/4 inch thick
- freshly washed arugula
- baguette (I used french bread)
- crumbled feta cheese.

1. Heat a grill or frying pan to Medium-High with a drizzle of olive oil.
2. Slice baguette (about 1/2 inch slices) and rub in the olive oil in the pan on both sides.
3. Stack crumbled feta, arugula and slices of peaches between the bread.
4. Put sandwich in pan or panini maker until both sides start to brown and are crispy.

Enjoy!

NEXT Market Challenge: Peaches

Photo by Arugula Files

OMG, YUM. Arugula Files just blogged about making this sandwich with peaches, creamy feta cheese, arugula, and bread. I have got to get to the Dupont Circle Farmers Market Sunday. [NOTE: Also, could use a panini maker.]